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(no subject) [Feb. 2nd, 2008|10:22 pm]
i fucking hate being in the "friend zone" as it has been so commonly called
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(no subject) [Nov. 16th, 2007|09:34 pm]
Girls
are like apples
on trees. The best ones
are at the top of the tree.
The boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling & getting hurt.
Instead, they get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples up top think
something's wrong with them when in
reality they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.
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(no subject) [Jun. 22nd, 2007|08:43 pm]
[Current Location |not my house]
[music |nothing]

dear god,

i am roman catholic, i attend church and do all that other bullshit that you preach about. maybe i go against it sometimes, but nobodies perfect, not even you,heres how:

what the fuck is your problem? are you going to take another one of my family away from me? what have they done? you are tearing these lives away from us, and in turn causes more greif for those who are living. they do nothing but care and love life, and other lives and here you are snatching them away. you have taken friends away from me, you hve taken 2 family members away in 2 weeks, and now a 3rd may be going into your "loving hand". well you know what, fuck you you peice of shit! your an asshole! its not only my family, but my friends are losing loved ones as well. my mom tells me that my grandmother dying in her sleep is a blessing from you. wait, WHAT HOW IS THAT A FUCKING BLESSING YOU PEICE OF SHIT??? SO WHAT, ITS PAINLESS SURE, BUT SHE STILL DIES!!!! FUCK YOU ASSHOLE

you know what. you do what you think is right. but remember this: i would gladly die in place of my family an friends. take my life in place of theirs. and you can give me the "blessing" you gave my grandmother, but there will still be the same result.

again, your an asshole. i dont like you at all. i still beleive your there, but i think you dont care.

-calvin


PS: tell my family and friends i say hi and that i love them to death
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(no subject) [May. 26th, 2007|10:21 am]
[Current Location |my house]
[mood | hungover a bit..but still sane]
[music |none]

cotie.....your my brother, i need you now probably more than ive ever needed you before. i really hope your home tonite. i need to talk to you, its that serious.
-calvin
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(no subject) [May. 24th, 2007|09:36 pm]
[Current Location |ryas hosue]
[music |lock step and gone RANCID!!!]

FUCKING GRAD 2007!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRATS TO ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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(no subject) [May. 23rd, 2007|05:39 pm]
[Current Location |my house]
[mood | cheerful]
[music |one of my lies-green day]

so umm....yeah i graduate in like a day....weird. i dont know what to think..other than the fact im not in prison :P

i dunno its still weerd as hell:S
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(no subject) [May. 1st, 2007|06:39 pm]
[Current Location |my house]
[mood |meh]
[music |nothing--->weird though im usually always listening to something]

happy 18th rya<3
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(no subject) [Apr. 12th, 2007|12:50 pm]
perhaps i should make my entrys not veiwable to everyone in case someone emails my entrys to the person im talking about
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(no subject) [Apr. 4th, 2007|04:53 pm]
[mood | bitchy]
[music |skunx-lars frederikson and the bastards]

wow, thats all i can say right now

so this summer me and rya are going to warped tour for sure. and rya tells me that iva, anai and patrick are supposed to be coming along. unfortunatly i was told that his brother may also be coming, in that case he can take care of his own fucking ticket cause the kids a bit of a douche.

so i dont really mind them coming, but im gonna be the only one that will not be 18. i dont really give a shit. but i find out today that patrick all of them are going to want to go out to the clubs the night before and shit. well they considerd me for a moment, and i got told patrick will rent me porn for the nite :@. wow, k i really hope your fucking joking. and judging by the way you looked today you werent. well, guess what...go out and get smashed, i dont give a fuck. but i hope ur hangover is really shitty for the shows. if paticks brother is coming he is not in the same hotel as me, and i hope he lips of the wrong person at the concert. because he is one person who should not belong there, and neither should his brother.

i fucking hate it when people go to these things that dont belong. we all know you dont like the music so why go?

anyway, if anyone pulls dumb shit then fuckem. im ditching them and finding my cousin or something. if rya decides to stay then fine.
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(no subject) [Mar. 5th, 2007|04:13 pm]
alot of people say that college is the time where young men and women expand the way they look at their world. when they open their minds to new ideas and expiriences and when they begin that long journey from the innocence of youth, to the responsibility of adulthood,
now isnt that a load of horse shit!
heres how it is, they throw a bunch of fancy words infront of kids in order to attract them to go into school in beleif they are going to have a better life. and we all know that all we are doing is breeding a brand new generation of buyers and sellers, BUYERS AND SELLERS, pimps and whores, PIMPS AND WHORES and indoctrinating them into a life-long hell of debt and indecision.



what is learning?

its paying attention. its opening yourself up to this great big ball of shit we call 'life'. and whats the worst that can happen? you get bit in the ass. well....let me tell you, my ass looks like hamburger meat, but i can still sit down



american education is in the shitter, because people forget the most important rule, that college is a service industry. you see all the kids paying to go there. they all want an experience. what kind of experience? well i dunno im not a god damn mind reader, ask them



taxes? lets see about that nonsense. if your RICH, the government will protect every butt you make and every shit you take.



health insurance my ass! they dont pay for shit!
you get sick on a friday? they only pay from monday through thursday
you go to doctor A? they only pay for doctor B
you break your penis? they only fix vaginas




everyone do me a favour. when your in school/college, enjoy it because its the best years of your life
cause then your fucked.






well tell me your thoughts
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(no subject) [Mar. 2nd, 2007|03:18 pm]
i got this from sam who got it from jane or teressa


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Opening credit: original prankster- the offspring

Waking up: death toll- the casualties

Average day: dominated love slave- green day

First date: coral fang- the distillers

Falling in love: so sick of you- the unseen

Fight scene: uptight-green day

Breaking up: my life to live- lars frederikson and the bastards feat. tim armstrong---->omfg, k look up the lyrics of the song and then see what i mean when i say 'omfg'

Getting back together: wine and roses-lars frederikson and the bastards

Life’s okay: bombs over brooklyn- love equals death

Mental breakdown: rudie cant fail- the clash

Driving: herojuana- NOFX

Flashback: opium of the people- slipknot

Partying: five vicodin chased with a shot of clarity- atreyu

Happy dance: finnegans wake-dropkick murphys

Regretting: the despair factor- afi

Long night alone: good riddance(time of your life)- green day

Death scene: road to acceptance- green day
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(no subject) [Jan. 1st, 2007|01:59 am]
[Current Location |i gotagd pee]
[music | nust pee]

Hoopy NEEWYEARE PPL

AND AHHOEY BDAY TERESSSSA YOU KNOW THAT IST AWSOME THAT RU SWVETNEEN

ABD HAPPY ENW YEAR COTIE IN DRUNK I UHOPE U R TOO BUTTHINGS ARESNT GOING WE;; FOR ME LATERLYT

byt yeah anyway im like tooalltyouttait ringht now and i dornt wanna moveright now but i think i have tod imust go hoe i need todgo to college and aply for a fuckloadk of thinks

this eyar i sresalove to beat ppl up thats piss me offs moreasofften

includeign wiggers afcutallyh no i dotnwaana fgint its suz and ot huets so id onwn awnna but you know what i mean yaheyah

talk about beatung bored i hare parents)rysa)

yeah but i willttyl latersi live newyraes bt it also sneekls i almost got duped on tonotie"(


bt ism onut
ttyl fuckers
ppl-shits




calvin
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(no subject) [Nov. 11th, 2006|09:20 pm]
[Current Location |my house]
[mood |smiley]
[music |ryas voice]

dustin:

i dont know if you heard what i said at the college the other nite, so i will say it again.

go through my shit again or keep spreading and making rumors about me, im gonna break ur teeth and charge you with invasion of privacy and sexual harrasment

so thank you and fuck you


PS fuck you patrick just feels sorry for you so you wont kill urself but everyone knows ur just a little attention seeking shit head.



and btw, for the ppl who think i am being an asshole right now. i have a good reason and i dont care what you think. so please keep your negative comments to yourself.
thanks
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(no subject) [Nov. 3rd, 2006|05:48 pm]
[Current Location |house]
[mood |guess]
[music |none]

shit, i dont know how to take this. i dont think ive had this much trama in my life. my grandmother just died this morning from cancer. i havent stopped crying since i heard....it feels like im swimming in a mixture of thought and tears put together.
it feels like my heart is broken, but yet it keeps beating.
i feel like im dying, yet im heathly as ever.
i feel like stabbing my eyes out to stop crying, but at the same time rejoicing the long life she had lived and the time i spent with her.

3 days ago we all went to get family picturs taken. every family member showed up. and she is in every shot taken. i cant help but notice the joy that all her family has come together in her last days of her life just for her memory.

what gets me is that she wasnt scared of death, and that she made the best of her life with only the few days she had left.

nobody knew when she was going to pass on, we just knew she wasnt going to live for much longer, but nobody had anticipated it to happen this soon

i have to go..

and for those who are reading this. dont die on me, i dont want to lose anyone
-calvin
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what to do [Sep. 12th, 2006|07:03 pm]
[Current Location |my house]
[mood | annoyed]
[music |crazy bitch-buck cherry]

what do you do when ur pateince run out on ppl you HAVE to be nice to, but they dont have to be nice to you at all?
what do you do when you start getting threats from these ppl?
what do you do when all you do is try to cooperate and earn respect and in return you get shit?
what do you do when you start to fear your future with someone you love?(although i dont have any doubts about this future)

well i can tell you right now i have pretty thick skin for shit like this. i dont usualy make a big deal about things when ppl are saying shit behind my back but my patience is wearing really thin. to the point where i am going to snap out on them. and its not just because of being assholes to me but also to someone in particular who i love. but i know if i do take that approach and snap out on them then i will only make matters worse. i mean, ive tried to have civilized convos with them and be respectful as much as i can towards them but nothing seems to work.

one of them calls me a freak all the time and thinks i should follow their certain dress code and be 'normal' and think 'normally' and stop being immature. i dont think im being immature and i dont think that i dress THAT weird. i mean, i dont do drugs, i dont smoke anymore, i dont drink as much anymore because of this, im trying to do good in school this year, and i work 3 jobs. i have lots of friends and i love life itself so i dont think im that bad of a person.

the other one thinks all i want to do is have sex and also thinks im a freak, again like i said above, IM NOT THAT BAD OF A PERSON.

and the little shit brother is a nitemare....all he does is make fun of me and if i take a stab back at him he goes and cries to his mom and I get in trouble.... like WTF ASSHOLE!!!

and half the time i hardly care because rya gets it 10 fucking times worse than i do! there is something really wrong with this world. stupid closeminded fuckers should all fucking die.

it would make me feel better if i could just take a gun and fucking blow all the close minded ppls tounges out the back of their fucking craniums. seriously, if there wasnt a law and my friends around to hold me back i would have soo many people on my hit list. and i know there is a few ppl who would agree with me.

so what am i supposed to do? get pushed around more without doing anything? ignore it perhaps?

well i dont know. but i do know that if i want the ppl who piss me off out of my life then i will have to get rid of the girl i love too. and i am most definatly not getting rid of the girl i love.

is it even my right to strongly dislike these people? perhaps even hate them? i feel like such a fucking dick and that i should be ashamed to even insult these people infront of her, and i probably should, because if i insult them then it seems like im insulting her. and that REALLY makes me feel like shit.

i dont know what i am going to do, i just know what im not gonna do, and that is break up with her, and i hope to god she doesnt break up with me


but im gonna go now, patricks here and we are going to booster juice and to drive around for a bit. please dont tell me you hope things work out because i dont know if it will.

-calvin
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(no subject) [Sep. 1st, 2006|11:37 pm]
[mood | angry]
[music |frontline- the casualties]

god im such a fucking idiot...yet it seems as though the ppl who are more of an idiot that i am have no cares or worries at all. FUCK
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(no subject) [Aug. 15th, 2006|12:07 am]
[mood | angry]
[music |zombie i- calabrese]

ppl get pissed off for such stupid ass reasons(i admit i do it too), but you just go fucking overboard alot. i got a fucking good reason to be pissed off, so i dont know what the fuck you are bitching about.
you keep telling me not to worry. well after this it made me worry alot!




zombie i-calabrese


When i am here i'm here with u
Bit off more than i could chew
I love your stare please stare at me
When i breathe blood and eternal sleep
We belong dead

Zombie i, girl please run away

As we run into the house
The wall of dead surrounds
Tentacles of decay flesh
tear and pull us down
Doors and windows boarded shut
But the pressure was too much
And the girl she gave it up
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(no subject) [Jul. 25th, 2006|07:51 pm]
[Current Location |my house]
[mood | meh]
[music |red hot moon- rancid]

i constantly see him hitting on her, and it sometimes seems like im getting the short end of the stick, even though i know i shouldnt care
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(no subject) [Jul. 24th, 2006|02:00 am]
poo
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(no subject) [Jul. 22nd, 2006|12:25 am]
[Current Location |patricks]
[mood | meh]
[music |some bullshitby the spicegirls]

well, i know its beena long time since i wrote in this thing, but im bored enough....im at patricks house rghtnow and they are watching spice world....this keyboard is really fucked up. but yeah my curfew is 1 and everyone else is staying til later so that fucking sucks.

but anyway, i got a question for everyone. do you hate it when your friends dont beleive you? your best friend perhaps?
wel a little situation happend quite a while ago and every is still fucking hung up on it. it pisses me off, well cotie, dont beleive me? well you dont need to cause i dont really care. just dont spread it around to everyone so that im always being asked. 'OMG what the fuck, did you really do that shit?' so quit spreading it around and think what you wanna think cause im not gonna convince you anymore, cause ive gave my side.




P.S. i was drunk dustin, i didnt mean any of it
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